It’s still Sunday, I just felt this topic deserved it’s own post.

I was taken completely off guard on Wednesday.  Just after saying goodbye to Mom T. (who we miss so much), our amazing nurse Jenn asked if we wanted to “Kangaroo” Remy….…. Yep, okay.  Wait HUH!?

Kangaroo care is a technique practiced on newborn, usually preemies, infants wherein the infant is held, skin-to-skin, with an adult. Kangaroo care seeks to provide restored closeness of the newborn with mother or father by placing the infant in direct skin-to-skin contact with one of them. This ensures physiological and psychological warmth and bonding. The kangaroo position provides ready access to nourishment. The parent’s stable body temperature helps to regulate the neonate’s temperature more smoothly than an incubator.

Translation; we get to hold Remy!!!!!!!!

This was the greatest thing I have ever done, Ever!  Mary would tell you the same.  Mary did it first, since, well, she’s the Mom. Remy just chills out on our chests and grabs our finger, cries a little in the beginning, which sounds more like a squeak or a high pitched whimper.  Sometimes she hiccups and twitches after getting settled in and she just sleeps and stretches on you.  I am happy to be her kangaroo any day, any time!  I go back and forth trying to figure out whom this benefits more.  Mary and I, or Remy?

Here is what a millisecond thought is like for me while this is happening:

Wow, you have changed my life. I am so lucky to have you. I will do everything in my power to give you the best life. You just tickled my belly with your miniature toes. I have a new purpose in life. I better not move too much.  I hope my singing isn’t scaring her for life.

Remy’s thoughts:

Aaaahhh, warm comfy bed!

We have switched taking turns kangarooing, everyday since Wednesday.   Today was pretty scary though.  Remy was twitching like crazy with spasm-like movements.   Both Mary and I were very worried.  We spoke to our nurse and she got the doctor for us.  He did not want to interrupt kangarooing, as it is so beneficial to Remy.  He said her vitals were okay and he would check more thoroughly after she was back in the incubator.

It was very concerning, because we read that preemies can be known to experience seizures, and even if she is fine, it is just plain hard to watch.   Turns out she is fine.  We spoke to some other moms and dads at the NICU and they reaffirmed  that their preemies went through the same thing.   I’m sure I would twitch, if I had all these things attached to me.

Today’s biggest payoff!   I was able to do something I have been dying to do for almost two weeks now.   I KISSED MY BABY GIRL FOR THE FIRST TIME.  I had chills.

Below are some pics of us kangarooing.

It’s Sunday.  We have gotten into the routine of being at the NICU everyday with Remy.  We just purchased a monthly spot in the garage across the street.  Our body clocks are starting to adjust to the new routine.  Still, sleep is a luxury.  I’m back on ambien, my old friend that I was hoping not to get reacquainted with.

My Dad has been hanging out with us today.   He is heading back to Florida tomorrow for a week or two and has a few doctor appointments to attend.   We’ll miss him, he has been a great help to us, and it’s awesome that he comes and hangs out with his first grandkid every few days!

One thing I didn’t mention in my last post, was that on Tuesday, as soon as Mary and I arrived, we noticed that Remy’s skin color was looking so much healthier.  She was starting to get a pinkish, tannish hue.  Her color looked almost identical to mine.  We were very excited.  Just after noticing that, I was told that Remy needed to get a blood transfusion later in the day.  Remy’s blood cell counts and platelets were low, on top of always getting blood drawn throughout the day.   So, the transfusion was more reassuring than scary, but nonetheless scary that it was needed.   We were told not to be too concerned.

I knew this was a possibility, so I gave blood at the blood bank the day after my arrival, and luckily they were able to use it.  After donating, when Mary was still in ICU, I casually mentioned that I should have asked them my blood type, and Mary, her mom and her sister all said, “What!” simultaneously.  I guess that was part of Taylor 101 growing up.  Don’t worry Mom, I’ll never forget again. I’m B-.  Anyway,  I just think it’s the coolest thing that I was able to be the donor for Remy!  Thanks so much to my friends and family who also donated for Remy.  Your blood will not be wasted. It will go to others in need.

Mission Milk: Mary has been a pumping machine!  At least every 3 hours (8-10 times a day).   We store the milk that she pumps in little freezer bags at home and in the NICU.  She pumps, I write.  She has a home and a hospital routine.  She likes pumping and chatting it up with the other moms in the NICU.  It is therapeutic for her to have others sharing similar experiences.   I’m just glad I don’t like milk because I’m a late night eater who likes to rummage through the fridge and the freezer and there’s no telling what I’ll eat, half asleep, at 4 am.

On Thursday we were finally able to put some of the milk to use.  Remy received 5 CC’s of milk , and we were excited for her first real food.   Similar to my emotions with the blood transfusion, Mary was very proud.  Unfortunately, on Friday they had to cease it  because she was not digesting it well, but hopefully that will change soon.  It’s okay though.  This may take some time and several attempts before her body is ready to break down Mom’s milk comfortably.

Other than that, Remy is doing very well.  They changed her SiPAP to a CPAP (these are the tubes that is attached to her nose).  These machines are often used for sleep apnea and a common aid for preemies.   While Remy has been breathing on her own for most of the week now, the SiPAP kept her lungs inflated, while she breathes in and out. The CPAP also keeps her lungs inflated, but only when she breathes in, not out.   This is a sign that her breathing and overall strength is continuing to get better.  The CPAP aids Remy in a way that helps her breathe more effortlessly.  It helps her keep to a more rhythmic breathing tempo, and it will keep getting decreased until she doesn’t need it anymore.  Think of it as a musician using a pendulum that ticks, helping one to follow the beats, while learning to play an instrument.

Everything is a slow and eventual process for a preemie.   The things that she would have developed in the womb now have to be learned through machines, human contact, and so forth.  It’s really so amazing how medical methods are always advancing.

Mentally, we are doing as well as we can.  Being home without our baby is becoming even more difficult.  Being there is comforting, but now she is usually covered with a blanket over the incubator.  This is good for her, helping her sleep, aiding her development and keeping a dark environment, as she would have in the womb. We sneak peaks and stick our hands in there as often as possible without interrupting her rest time.

Enjoy these pics of Remy, Remy with Mom T., and Mom’s Milk.